Katie has celiac disease and I am lactose intolerant so the holidays can be a giant pain in the rear.... figuratively & literally.

Here are a few tips that you can use to make the next holidays more tolerable.

Resist Peer Pressure

Remember this one from elementary school?

Everyone wants you to "Just take a bite... Just take a bite. It won't hurt you." without truly understanding that it WILL hurt you possibly for days or weeks.

Here's a couple polite ways to educate them about your dietary restrictions and reject their food.

"That does look really good, but...

"Maybe I forgot to tell you that I am celiac & can't have gluten."

"You may not remember, but I have food allergies and it will make me sick."

They certainly don't want to make you sick... unless they're just an asshole.

In which case, you probably don't want to be hanging out with them anyway.

I'm a bit more pointed... a little less refined.

I will usually start with a more ornery response like,

"If you think your plumbing can handle it!" or "It's your toilet!"

This usually gets a confused look at which point I will explain that I'm lactose intolerant and that I'd rather not spend the rest of the visit in their bathroom.

I'm a bit more blunt about it.

Be Resourceful

We've all been to a party or function that has food, but we can't really eat any of it for fear of cross-contamination.

This is an awkward situation to be in.

Bring your own food to eat while everyone else is eating, so you're not just watching.

If this is what it takes to avoid starving, JUST DO IT!

Because in the end, it really is less about feeling awkward & more about simply not starving.

Be Vigilant

People are going to offer you food... sometimes very persistently.

However, nobody knows more about YOUR health than you.

And nobody is more accountable for YOUR health than you.

It is up to you to take control of your diet & your health.

If you're surrounding yourself with people that refuse to understand or be empathetic, then it's up to you to decide if the relationship is worth your health.

If possible, start phoning in for those holidays & they might start to get the idea.

Don't Be Entitled

You can't just expect everyone else to accommodate your allergies, intolerances, or disease.

Especially if you haven't personally educated them on the subject.

Most people have never been told about cross-contamination among other things, so don't take it personally when some people don't exactly 'get it' right away.

Try to use it as a teaching moment, but if they consistently act like a jerk about it, refer to previous tip.

However, if you have family or friends that are making a genuine effort, acknowledge it and be thankful.

Many celiacs have to deal with friends or family members that refuse to be understanding about it or think that it's not a real thing.

Having the patience to remind them that not everyone is blessed with a golden gut can be challenging.

Of course if they keep insisting, and you're lactose intolerant like me, you can always do what I do...

Say,"Fine", eat whatever is offered and then blow-up their guest toilet like a construction site port-a-potty...

Don't hesitate to use that decorative soap & hand towel...

Then announce, "DON'T GO IN THERE!" to the party upon exiting.

You might not be invited back or they might be more careful what they feed you next time.

Either way you win.

I am joking of course... I would seek the privacy of their master bathroom. =D